Your face will thank you.

DAY 0

I have a beard. It’s not a big beard, but it’s a beard, it’s mine, and I’m proud of it. That being said, in the decade-plus I’ve had a beard, I’ve never singled it out for special treatment. Meanwhile, all around me the world has filled with new and exciting beard-pampering products. It’s time to expand my horizons.

DAY 1

Today is the first day of the rest of my life, and it’s starting with a scrub of Every Man Jack Beard Wash. While I wash my face regularly, my beard has always just been part of the whole “face” area – I never thought to give it its own special spa routine. I have been missing out. I feel a newfound freshness, and the cedarwood scent leaves me feeling closer to the mountain man that my beard wishes I was.

Next up is the Art of Shaving Beard Conditioner (peppermint). I’d never given much thought to the softness of my beard – I kind of thought it was already sufficiently teddy bear-like. I have never been so wrong. After a minute of conditioning I realized my beard may as well have been the facial equivalent of steel wool. Plus, now I smell like a candy cane. And I like it.

The last step was applying some Jack Black Beard Oil. Now my impression of beard oil has always been that it’s reserved for lumberjacks and urban dudes who would prefer being lumberjacks than the stable, well-educated tech company employees they are. Having tried it, I find my beard looking and feeling sleeker. Classier. Like a luxury car after a great detailing session.

DAY 4

This beard wash is really, really refreshing. Like, really. It’s like scrub, splash, ready to take on the world. A welcome addition to my morning routine, which has gone pretty much unchanged since that day during finals in college when I realized that not shaving was way better than shaving.

My beard is soft and I still smell like a candy cane. And I still like it.

I’ve let my beard get a little bit longer, and as a result and enjoying the benefits of the beard oil even more. It’s still not long enough to do any major sculpting, but there’s definitely an improved tidiness that I’m enjoying.

DAY 7

I am fresh. I am clean. I am reveling in all the good feelings that come with a well-washed beard.

My beard is soft, I smell even more like a candy cane, and I still like it. So does my wife.

After a week, my beard is a well-oiled machine. (If machines were beards.)

I’ve got to say, I have a new appreciation for well-groomed, thoughtfully cared-for facial hair. I’m going to stay on the lookout for other products to help me up my beard game. In the meantime, I’ll relax and breathe in the sweet aroma of peppermint-scented success.

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